Shark Teeth Necklace

The World's Manliest Necklace

  When I design and create things for myself, I can't help but push the concepts to their limits. It's the only thing that entertains me. Not what should be done, but what CAN be done.

  I've been wearing chainsaw chain necklaces, wallet chains, and bracelets for almost 20 years now. Naturally, that was my starting point. What is even more Aggressive than chainsaw chain? F$cking Shark Teeth. Black fossilized shark teeth to match. And it's even Vegan friendly. How quaint. The shark teeth are excellent. Hard as rock (they ARE rock), black as metal, and even still Serrated. Perfect. And how should we attach these? Titanium wire. Yes, real Titanium. Yes, it was a NIGHTMARE to work with.

  I knew from years of first hand experience, that wearing chainsaw chains wasn't particularly comfortable. (Who could have guessed?) And I knew the additional weight and inertia from the shark teeth would only exacerbate this issue. That's how we came to our next manly element. Military paracord. The section that sits against your neck is actually soft, comfortable, and looks excellent with its wrap. This brings us to the final elements. Techflex high-end electronics wrap woven together and hiding rubber bands inside. This allows the necklace to have a clasp-less design and answers the annoying question that I get often. "What if someone comes up behind you and chokes you with it!?!" The rubber bands will simply break and you can turn around and bludgeon whoever assaulted you.

  Now that I have shark teeth permanently tattooed on my neck, this necklace is a bit redundant for my aesthetic. At this point, I would like to see it used by someone else who is still deserving of its Brutality and Elegance.